When you are a caregiver — whether it’s for a spouse, partner, parent, or friend — there are many conflicts that can arise. Managing those conflicts can be difficult, though it doesn’t have to be with the right figurative toolset. Whether the conflict arises from providing care, helping with housing, money trouble, medications, or personal time, it’s important to be able to communicate your needs in a calm and reasonable way. Difficult conversations don’t have to be uncomfortable.

Having these communication skills can greatly improve your chances of being heard and getting your message across. These are important skills that can help you communicate in a number of difficult situations.

Difficult Conversations and How to Manage Them

When it comes to difficult conversations, it’s essential to put yourself in the shoes of the person you are talking to. Whether they are a spouse or parent, it is important to talk about certain uncomfortable topics at times. How would you like them to handle the situation if the tables were turned? Remember to stay calm and empathetic. Here are some tips and tricks for having difficult talks.

How to Have Difficult Conversations

Remind Them That You’re on Their Side

Be sure to express that you love them and share their concerns. Remind them, if necessary, that you are their caregiver and have their best interests at heart. Read this article on starting tough conversations.

Express How the Situation Impacts You

Since you are certainly affected by the situation, be sure to express that to your care recipient. Be sure to use “I” statements rather than “you.” “You” statements can come across as accusatory and harsh. Sticking with “I” statements comes across as more authoritative.

Ask Opened Ended Questions, and Listen to the Answers

Don’t assume you know their side of things inherently. It is a good idea to ask open-ended questions so they have the opportunity to share what they are thinking with you. Encourage them to express their concerns and wishes. Be sure you listen to what they are saying. After all, they are the experts on themselves, not you. This can be somewhat complicated if there are cognitive issues involved. However, it is still important to listen to their side, even if they may not fully understand what is happening. Be patient, listen, and as best you can, explain the situation and repeat it if necessary.

Solve the Problem Together

It is important as a caregiver to keep your caretaker in the loop and as an active participant in the solution. This way you can both come to terms with the situation that needs addressing.

Take a Break if the Conversation Becomes Too Intense

Again, these are difficult conversations and they may not always go as smoothly as we would hope. Should this occur, you can recommend a break. 

Expect to Revisit the Topic

Very few issues, especially complex ones, get solved over the course of a single discussion. It is best if you expect to revisit the topic as concerns or questions arise.

Do Your Research

There is a lot of information out there about having difficult conversations. If you are looking to address end-of-life wishes or later in life care, be sure to make sure you have a plan for the conversation. If you are looking for a good way to start a tough conversation, we have a resource for that as well.

Don’t let the future catch you off guard and start planning today with this FREE eBook, Plan the Future for You and Your Spouse’s Long-Term Care.

Confident Living is a continuing care at home membership program, focused on helping you remain active and independent as you age in your own home. We serve the greater Cincinnati area. For more information, contact us online or call (513) 719-3522.